I believe people want to be their best and flourishing self. However, often in life, our old behaviors and legacy thinking can be our nemesis. I’ve seen this play out over and over in my years as an executive coach. Limited beliefs that are deeply ingrained can seem “normal” when that is not the case. These beliefs often perpetuate the pattern of settling for our “lesser self” when what we really want is to bust past such beliefs… and achieve what we know we are deserving and capable of.

While people want the quick fix, you just can’t slap lipstick on the pig when it comes to behavioral change. You must get to the root cause and break the patterns from there.

This brings to mind the day my positive psychology instructor, Tal Ben-Shahar (Harvard researcher and best-selling author) made a recommendation to our class, “If there is only one book you get from this course … make itYou are Not Your Brainby Jeffrey M. Schwartz, M.D. & Rebecca Gladding, M.D. So, I bought it.

And Tal was right. This book is the key to helping identify and overcome negative thoughts and change bad habits for good. With a proven-4 step method, the authors explain how to do just that by teaching you how to reset the message to one that empowers you instead of owns you. This is how you change your brain. From there you can more easily increase your positivity, your confidence, your gratitude and your self-esteem … and oppose “deceptive brain messages” (DBM’s) that wreak havoc in your life.

Here’s how it works

1) Re-Label
Identify your deceptive brain message and the uncomfortable sensations; call them what they really are.

2) Re-Frame
Change your perception of the importance of the deceptive brain messages – why do these thoughts keep bothering you?

3) Re-Focus
Direct your attention off the DBM through a healthy activity that doesn’t allow your DBM to run rampant.

4) Re-Value
Clearly see your DBM’s for what they are. They no longer have the same control or power over you.

I highly recommend this book and this process. It’s had a significant effect on my own life as well as many of my clients. One of my favorite examples is how my client, a successful sales professional changed his thought process. He had a habit of self-deprecation that he carried from a young age. He thought this was a way of building connection. Everyone loved him because he was charming and funny. Yet, it was always at his own expense. One day, I pointed it out. He was completely unaware of this habit. I challenged him to change the pattern. After a few months of recognizing and changing that habit … this is what he gained:

“Paula doubled my income with one observation and a small adjustment to my attitude. My customers now see a top sales person they want to do business with. The best part is … I’m in year three and sales continue to increase. Now, seven figure club is within reach.”

It’s time to kick your DBM’s to the curb and set yourself free!
You can order the book on Amazon